alphabetical author index

Kitchen Witches, The

  • Caroline Smith
  • Full Length Play, Comedy, Present Day, Contemporary
  • 2M, 2F
  • ISBN: 9780573632860

Canadian playwright Caroline Smith has whipped up a hilarious tale.

Simcoe Times-Reformer

Take a handful of animated actors, add a lively and responsive audience, let the plot thicken and you get a savoury show that's sure to please even the fussiest palate.

The Orangeville Banner

  • Full Length Play
  • Comedy
  • 120 minutes

  • Time Period: Present Day, Contemporary
  • Target Audience: Adult, Senior
  • Set Requirements: Interior Set
  • Cautions: Alcohol, Mild Adult Themes

  • Performance Group:
  • Dinner Theatre, Community Theatre, Professional Theatre, Shoestring Budget, Blackbox / Second Stage /Fringe Groups

  • Accolades:
  • Winner! 2005 Samuel French Canadian Playwrights Contest
Isobel Lomax and Dolly Biddle are two 'mature' cable-access cooking show hostesses who have hated each other for 30 years, ever since Larry Biddle dated one and married the other. When circumstances put them together on a TV show called The Kitchen Witches, the insults are flung harder than the food!

Dolly's long-suffering TV-producer son Stephen tries to keep them on track, but as long as Dolly's dressing room is one inch closer to the set than Isobel's, it's a losing battle, and the show becomes a rating smash as Dolly and Isobel top both Martha Stewart and Jerry Springer!

Pre-recorded jingles and other sound cues listed in the script are available for purchase; email carolinesmith@sympatico.ca for information on cost. Producers of The Kitchen Witches are also encouraged to change the business names, locations and sponsors mentioned in the script to local references.

REVIEWS:

Canadian playwright Caroline Smith has whipped up a hilarious tale.

Simcoe Times-Reformer

Take a handful of animated actors, add a lively and responsive audience, let the plot thicken and you get a savoury show that's sure to please even the fussiest palate.

The Orangeville Banner
Premiere Production: The Kitchen Witches was first produced at the Stirling Festival Theatre in Stirling Ontario in June 2003.
  • Casting: 2M, 2F
  • Casting Notes: One non-speaking role can be played by either male or female.

  • DOLLY BIDDLE - 50s; a little cherub of a woman, prone to overweight but always going at top speed. She indulges herself with anything life has to offer whenever possible -- even if it's not good for her!? -- and her creative imagination knows no bounds. She is intensely proud of her son Stephen, loves to dispense advice along with recipes for cabbage rolls and borscht and hates Isobel Lomax with an intensity usually reserved for detonating nuclear devices.
  • STEPHEN BIDDLE - 30s; a nervous, prematurely balding but decent young man who actually enjoys producing low-budget cable TV shows, even when his Mom is the star. Bright and capable, if somewhat shy, but always reluctant to confront Dolly on her many shortcomings. He's not a fighter -- he'd rather be a lover, but nobody's asked him yet.
  • ISOBEL LOMAX - Thinks Martha Stewart could learn something about homemaking from her. She trained at the Cordon Bleu and enjoyed a successful career, including her own show "Busy Izzy." Isobel likes people to think she has a much classier background than reality supports; she would never go without being properly accessorized. At heart, she is a bright funny and articulate woman who has come to terns with the choices she made early in life.
  • ROB THE CAMERA GUY (or ROBERTA THAT CAMERA CHICK) - Non-speaking role (except for one line!). Rob is a young "Goth" inspired person; Stephen is a little afraid of him/her. He/she cleans up the sets, resets props, carries the portable camera around during the "live broadcasts" and despite his/her appearance, is generally efficient and precise. (Can be played by an actual ASM or production assistant.)
  • Name Price
    Kitchen Witches, The Script Order Now

    Isobel Lomax and Dolly Biddle are two 'mature' cable-access cooking show hostesses who have hated each other for 30 years, ever since Larry Biddle dated one and married the other. When circumstances put them together on a TV show called The Kitchen Witches, the insults are flung harder than the food! Dolly's long-suffering TV-producer son Stephen tries to keep them on track, but as long as Dolly's dressing room is one inch closer to the set than Isobel's, it's a losing battle, and the show becomes a rating smash as Dolly and Isobel top both Martha Stewart and Jerry Springer!Pre-recorded jingles and other sound cues listed in the script are available for purchase; email carolinesmith@sympatico.ca for information on cost. Producers of The Kitchen Witches are also encouraged to change the business names, locations and sponsors mentioned in the script to local references.

    $24.95