In the 1950s, Captain Rockets is the star of a cheaply produced children's show on the floundering DuMont television network. With a ridiculously low budget, the rocket ship is actually a ragtag collection of ancient theatrical flats that shake and wobble when anybody touches them, and the control panel has knobs that are actually the caps of old bleach bottles. On this fateful day, Luna, the Captain's beautiful companion, announces the grim news that the network has canceled the series, but Captain Rockets goes bravely on for one last show, fortified by the Venusian Polyp Juice (vodka) he's been drinking all day. Unhinged by his wife's desertion, the falling apart of his career, and his upcoming appearance before the House UnAmerican Activities Committee because he attended a couple of meetings in the thirties to try and get a blond girl to sleep with him, Captain Rockets has become convinced that Brain Eaters from Betelgeuse who have a secret base on Uranus are responsible for the cancellation of the show, and he is determined to root them out and destroy them before they can slurp out the last human brains.

Published in Machiavelli & Other Plays.